Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Natural News Lots of interesting articles on this website.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Migraines

I have had two migraines this week. I usually get a mild, easily-gotten-rid-of one on the first day of my period. The first one passed reasonably easily, but the one today was terrible. I woke up with it as usual. I thought maybe I had just slept wrong or something, but it didn't go away. It was a bad one that made me nauseated. I went back to bed after taking 4 ibuprofen and a mild prescription muscle relaxant. It eased off, but never went away. I still have it. Any ideas? Do you guys get them?

Thursday, July 03, 2008

All By Myself

I get to spend three-and-a-half days at my home by myself this weekend. Jerry is going to Eastern WA to visit friends and family. I was going, but couldn't find a dog sitter. No biggee...I get to be home, by myself for a good portion of the time. I'm have big plans - caulk the bathtub, clean and organize the garage, tidy up and beautify the "pond", burn the weeds in the driveway, clean house, etc. No other opinions to consider. I'll only be missing muscles, but I can probably figure it out. I can eat what and when I want. I get the whole bed to myself.
Am I weird?
I may get to babysit Alysssa - which will be the highlight of the weekend for me, of course. I'm one of those goofy Grammas. I sure hope Kristen calls me.

Hoo-boy

I looked at the scale and took my measurements for the first time in about a year last night.

Depressing.

Remind me that I'm only three and a half weeks post-partum and this will get better.

I honestly don't feel as big as I must look...and yesterday someone (who doesn't know me and didn't have to be nice--long story) guessed that I weighed about 40 lbs less than I do.

I honestly do not want to focus on my weight or to get down on myself or to spiral into self-loathing (like I did a few years ago) when I have a beautiful daughter to enjoy (not to mention, set an example for).

There has to be some way to motivate myself to eat well and exercise without shame, berating myself or becoming obsessive again. Right? (I think I may have answered this question in my last paragraph.)

I think I also have to let go of the dream that I could be a size 8. It took me to 1300 calories a day, massive amounts of self-hatred and fear, and a fanatical obsession with counting calories to get there before--and that was very short-lived. I can't and won't be that again. Seriously, thin thighs aren't worth it--and I have to let go of that single-digit "dream."